"Fore": That's one hell of a rant.
Jill: ...

Arrow Down
— Jill's reaction
Jill: Was this last saturday?
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— Jill's second reaction

Men prefer “Christmas Cakes”, study reveals is an article published by The Augmented Eye. And it includes two versions that will show depending on your decisions of the day.

Transcript Edit

For the longest time, the term “Christmas Cake” referred to women aged 26 or above, who are regarded as undesirable -- just like a Christmas cake that ceases being useful after December 25th.

But men around Glitch City apparently have developed a sweet tooth.

“Who doesn’t like a mature woman?” Todd, 19, told The Augmented Eye. “They have all the necessary experience already and plus, I’m soooo tired of spoiled, immature girls doing stupid sh*t. I say bring on the hot office ladies!”

Jill, 27, is confused. “Christmas what? Is that like the opposite of Beefcake?” After discovering the real meaning, she launched into an hour-long rant. "I'll let you know pencil skirts are the best!"

If Alma gets drunk this last part changes to:Edit

Alma Armas, 29, is pleased. “About damn time. I’m tired of those highschool fuckers stealing the cute boys,” After a 30-minute rant, she concluded, “THEY TOOK OUR BOOYYYS!”


  • This is the only article that change its contents depending on whether or not a character gets drunk (Alma in this case)
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